It's taken quite a few days (mostly because I poured a lot of emotion into my last post, partly because I'm having a bit of a lazy time), but I finally got around to compiling a list of the men who have had a profound influence on the person I am. Unlike my last list, this selection is comprised of more public figures and famous faces. I suppose it is odd that, in terms of role models, a lot of my most influential figures are men aged 40 and over (or even dead). I couldn't possibly give you a real reason why this is the case - perhaps it is another example of why I was born in the wrong era? Perhaps there was some sort of mix-up, and really, these were the people I should have spent my time with. Whatever the case, there are men who are there day to day, or have been a part of my life and left in due course, but their inspiration still stands.
This is a thanks to all the men, old and new, who have helped me find the most important parts of myself.
I'd like to start with the most obvious one, so that it's out of the way. I know it's not a big secret, and I know it wont come as a surprise, but he is still a massive part of the reason I am who I am. Tim Curry, is most obviously a role model due to his place in Rocky Horror, and I pay thanks to him for that all the time, in abundance. But if I wanted to give thanks for that, I'd have credited the character and not the actor. I'm crediting the man himself here, because in himself, he is influential. Tim Curry has achieved so much in his long life, and is still doing so even now. He has been through much that even I, his super-fan, don't even know about, I'm sure. He's had a stroke and he's still making appearances and participating, even though he's earned a lengthy, relaxed and reclusive retirement. If you look at the other roles that he has taken on in his lifetime, one might think "What on earth!", because there are some oddball things in there, but he wanted to do them and he did, and he doesn't care about anyone's opinion about that. He turned down a lot of roles to do something he had always wanted to do - He wanted to go on tour and record albums, and even if they weren't massively commercially successful, he did it. He used his wide-ranging success as a platform to do the things he'd always wanted to. I am often saddened by how under-appreciated he and his work is. He is the very interpretation of "Don't dream it, be it!", and that is wholly inspirational.
Someone that goes hand in hand with Tim is the very father of Tim's most iconic role - Richard O'Brien. O'Brien created something that has influenced not just me but millions of people for four decades! The message most strongly associated with Rocky Horror has helped people through transitions and revelations and self-discovery. He fights and raises money and awareness for lots of human right's charities (most notably Amnesty International), and is an advocate for LGBTQ rights. He is a firm believer that everyone should be able to be who they want to be, and I think that is an important, inspirational message.
In a completely different, but in some ways similar direction, the next influential dude on my list is rock 'n' roll heartthrob, Lemmy Kilmister. Okay, maybe not a heartthrob for everybody. One of my proudest pieces of artwork is the Lemmy poster I have sitting proudly in the corner of my room (courtesy of my lovely aunt Elma), where he stares wild-eyed as he holds a bunch of dynamite. Lemmy is an inspiration because he has lived a full and complete life. He has done and achieved so much in his field - He is basically the founding father of punk and heavy metal (although he does not agree on the latter).He rose from a little welsh town, in the face of a difficult family situation, to be a rock god who has slept with over a thousand women. He lived to be nearly 70, after not expecting to make it past 30 - he is the very definition of legendary, and I was more than slightly heartbroken when he did finally pass away this year. I never really found it in me to pay real tribute to him, but he is almost beyond words. He inspired a generation of much needed rock, metal and punk bands. He reminds me that it is okay to enjoy myself, that anyone can be what they want to be and go where they want to go. He reminds me to keep rocking, and enjoy it, because death is inevitable, so you might as well have fun until it comes at you.
I'd like to move onto a group of people that Lemmy might not really have paid much attention to in life - Teachers. My teachers, across the years, have obviously taught me a lot, as it's their job. However, there is a trio I would like to pay particular homage to.
I'd like to start with Mr Turner, My secondary school Geography teacher up until year 10. Readers who were educated at the same school as me will know Mr Turner, because he was a big character - He's been working the department for god knows how long, and he is a fantastic teacher. Mr Turner had a great sense of humor and didn't suffer fools gladly. Geography was already a subject I took great interest in, and Mr Turner reminded me of some of my old primary school teachers back home, so I was always looking to impress him.
Second up is Mr Davies, my English teacher up until year 10. I lost my two favourite teachers after going into my GCSE years, which made me sad, as I'd picked and invested myself in the subjects because I got along with my teachers. Mr Davies had a wonderful flair for the dramatic, a great sense of humor and was very similar in his attitude to Mr Turner in that he didn't put up with shenanigans. He was very personable, but most importantly, he was well read in things that I found interest in as well. I'd often go away and look up or read things that Mr Davies mentioned in class outside of the curriculum.
Last but not least on the list is Mr Hayball, who was my tutor all the way through my secondary education. He was funny and friendly and again, very personable. Mr Hayball got on well with my whole tutor group and was always approachable. He had a strange appreciation for packaging that most people didn't really get (myself included). He was probably the hardest person to say goodbye to in the end.
All of these men are inspirations in the same way, but perhaps the better word would be motivators. These men didn't see my best years in many ways - I found school difficult for a number of reasons, and by the end of it, even in my favourite subjects, I wasn't as invested as I should have been, even if I achieved well in all of them. Because of this, in the back of my mind, I have this constant motivation to be someone that they would be able to bump into one day in the pub or the supermarket and they would be able to listen to my story and be proud of me. Even if never happens, that is the person I want to be.
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| The only picture I have of any of these three... Mr Hayball. |
There is another man I might never get that acknowledgement from, but I strive to make proud as well. And luckily for him, he'll probably never see this. My brother Jake deserves a mention not only because he is someone I want to make proud, just like the rest of my family, but because he also says it like it is. You can always count on Jake to be arse-hole-ishly honest, but I love him for that. My brother doesn't sugar coat anything, but in his own way, he's very supportive. He's also inspired a lot of my musical taste. I look up to my big brother, and I want to be as cool as him, and I want him to think I'm cool. That's as good a reason as any to think he's inspiring.
I like to think my brother would approve of my next choice, although whether he feels the same kind of passion is another matter. Bill Hicks is a critical thinking genius, who waged verbal war on war, marketing, religion and politics as well as other social issues. He is someone I identify with heavily, and whenever he's on, I tend to sit with my nose nearly pressed to the glass as I mop up every brilliant word he says. Hicks helped open my eyes to the absurdity and destructive nature of modern culture (in terms of politics and conflict and religion), and normalised many opinions that I already held, but felt were not common place. His satirical attiude, even though he was long gone before I was even born, is quite refreshing. I feel that although his subject matter dates, obviously, the idea of it doesn't, the world is the same in aspect, just worse. I think if Bill could see the state of America (and indeed the rest of the world) he'd be turning in his grave. Hicks' attitude has taught me one main lesson - That life is just a ride.
I often have this weird, hypothetical fear that if I ever met my idols, that they'd think I'm an asshole, and more so than with anyone, I have this particular worry with Bill Hicks, mostly because of the next choice on my list. I will defend myself with the fact that it is a brief mention, and I take into account all the issues the two characters had between them. Next on my list is Dennis Leary. Now I was fully aware without even having to look it up that Leary ripped off a lot of Hicks' material, and I agree that was unacceptable. But, Leary also does plenty of material in 'No Cure For Cancer' (the only show of his I've ever really enjoyed) that was original (I hope, I don't know for sure) and backed up a lot of the lessons that I learned from Bill. That's exactly how I treat it, a reiteration of the philosophy taught by the greatest. And they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. I found again with Dennis Leary, this sort of normalisation of the ideas that I held but felt were too radical. I found people out there, with these men, that felt the same outrage as I did, and that is pretty important, that sort of validation when you're someone like me.
I'd like to move on to to another similarly critical thinker, but this one is alive in the here and now, casting this empirical eye on modern issues and dilemmas and satirising the supposedly "untouchable" in a war on using ridiculous beliefs as a means of oppressing people, conning them out of money or indeed both. Unlike Hicks and Leary, he is quieter, less loud and raucous and "offensive". Tim Minchin is a wonderful comedian with awe-inspiring musical talent, phenomenal vocabulary and killer dance moves. Similarly to Hicks and Leary, the reason I find Tim so inspirational is because he normalises views I associate with, as well as being able to put them so eloquently where I sometimes fail. Whenever I'm talking, arguing or thinking in a philosophical, political or sociological standpoint, I call upon these three main muses as my guiding teachers, because they know just how to say what I can't.
Not everyone who Inspires you in life does so in a positive manner - sometimes people will come into your life and you will look at the havoc they wreak and you will eventually think "you are exactly not who I want to be". They are some people who lead by example, but many people don't. It is sad that these people exist, and I think we all meet them in our lives, and not-so-regrettably, I have met my fair share. But the regrettable part of this, is that one of those people is my own dad. I'm quite open about what happened with my dad, it affected not only me but my whole family, and often, I feel guilty for that, which is one way he inspires me each day to make up for his mistakes. Don't get me wrong, I have plenty of lovely happy memories of my dad, but not enough. Almost everyday I think of the person I might have been if I'd stuck around, and I endeavor to stride in the opposite direction. It doesn't always work, and sometimes I look around me and think I'm not getting anywhere, and for days like that, I have my family to look to, to support me. In addition to him being a negative example, I also wan to make my dad proud. Perhaps it'll never happen, but like a lot of people on this list, I have visions of one day meeting my dad again and telling him about everything I've done and the people I've met and everything I achieved, and I like to think that he might be proud of me - it's a long shot, but it's something I work for.
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| I don't have many pictures, but this is the one I carry in my wallet. |
Of course, as you might know , I've got more than one dad to make proud. So the final inspirational man on my list is my step-dad Dave. Every year I post something ridiculously sappy on fathers day for Dave, because he deserves it. Dave has stepped up to the plate and helped my family through the worst of times, because he not only loves our mother, but he loves all of us (possibly with the exception of Jake?) There is no one more inspiring than this man, who works hard at his job to make everyone happy, and always makes time to hear my problems at home. Dave is one of the least selfish people I know, and that in itself is inspiring. He's not just my Dad, but my best friend, and I know I can count on him when I need him. For his efforts, much like any family on this list, I strive to make him proud of me one day, to know all his hard work and advice wasn't wasted and ignored.
And so there we are. I think it is easier to be inspiring when you have people who really inspire you, and at the end of the day, besides making people proud and finding and giving love, what I really want to do is help inspire people, even in the little ways.
Thank you for reading - now go out into the world, and be inspirational!
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